December 2009
58 posts
[13:21] velcrosneakers: my job here is like chasing around 20 children with diapers full of steaming hot diarrhea [13:21] velcrosneakers: and everyone wants to be changed STAT and i only have 2 hands and a half box of baby wipes
And also, the Lunch Bandit struck again and drank someone’s clearly labeled Coke Zero. People are rotten.
MMMEAT
I’m watching Jonathan Saffron Foer on Ellen right now and he just gave me some valuable medical advice! He said that if my doctor tells me that I need to eat more meat because I’m lacking protein, I should RESIST this! It’s merely an idea being sold to me by corporations! That’s right, I should listen to a book AUTHOR over my own DOCTOR who has, you know, a medical degree.
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Tumblr Mosaic Viewer →
Cecil pointed me the Tumblr Mosaic Viewer where you can enter in any tumblr name after the “=” to view all posts on one page. Pretty neat. I never saw this mildly (ie. VERY) gay picture of Adam Brody before. Whatever, still hot. Also, HI DOGGY. ARE YOU SMILING AT ME, DOGGY? YES YOU ARE, OH YES YOU ARE!!!!!!!!
This morning I got another dumb MASS HOLIDAY TEXT from an ex-coworker who I’m not even friends with. We never talk, not even on IM, and we’ve never hung out outside of work. This person mass texts for EVERY single holiday and it’s always something lame like, “GOOBLE GOOBLE, HAPPY THANKSGIVING!” Yes, she spelled “gobble” wrong. I got fed up with it and...
Watchhexagonhexagon:
Geoff McFetridge for The Whitest Boy Alive
This put a janky smile on my face. It reminded me that I have to get more music from The Whitest Boy Alive. Torrently speaking, where are you guys downloading now? Not that I obtain music illegally but just, you know, out of curiosity… because Demonoid and Mininova are kaputz and Isohunt is just so-so.
Snowboots
Wait, I think I just found snowboots that aren’t that aesthetically offensive and they look totally practical. Well, they aren’t that practical when you’re lounging around PANTSLESS and with your shirt halfway unbuttoned. Ew, skankho.
Actually upon further reading it looks like the style I like is the men’s version and the women’s is the shitty pair with all the...
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PnclSkirt: oh! and get this
PnclSkirt: she was like "he has this weird thing right now where he likes to lick the bottom of people's shoes! we just let him so it's ok if he wants to do it"
velcrosneakers: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT
velcrosneakers: GIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRL
velcrosneakers: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT
PnclSkirt: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
velcrosneakers: GIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRL
velcrosneakers: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT
velcrosneakers: IS THIS THE KID YOU'RE BABYSITTING?!
PnclSkirt: YESSSSSSSSS
velcrosneakers: OMG GIRL YOU GOTTA SET HIM STRAIGHT
velcrosneakers: DUDE THERE ARE LIKE, FECES PARTICLES ON SHOES
velcrosneakers: WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
velcrosneakers: NO WONDER HE'S BEEN SICK
velcrosneakers: HE'S BEEN EATING SHIT AND MUD AND INSECT PARTS
Top Shit
I’m never watching Top Chef ever again.* That was worse than when Josea won last season. That was worse than season 5 of The Wire in terms of soul crushing disappointment. UGH.
*I will probably watch the next season of Top Chef
Inadvertently dirty things I said at work today
Have you had the downstairs tacos?
Why does he like to lick the knob?
Evolution of the Hipster 2000-2009 →
That's enough, Jason Segel. →
On Shows
If I were to become President, the seating/standing situation at concerts would be arranged by height; no ifs, ands or buts about it. If I were elected, it would behoove you to go to shows with friends around your height. Plan B: Does Easy Spirit make 5” comfortable platforms for concert goers?
Concerts must have been so much better 20 years ago when there was a lack of cellphones. Why do...
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